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Empathy
Don’t.
Agree. Don’t let them make it about them.
Any tips on dealing with people that don’t like you?
I would normally order my goons to deal with them.
Sure thing, boss, working on it
Borrow something from then. Then, when you return it, be very grateful, and maybe give a bottle or chocolates or say you owe them one.
After that they will be nicer to you.
You might want to scale that down a little bit. I never borrowed somebody’s tape gun for a minute at work and thought, what a nice coworker I should send him flowers.
Indeed. I should have said “borrow something important”. It needs to be something they care about, or something they know you care a lot about. How you say thanks are examples.
Why would a person who doesn’t like you want to lend you something that they care about?
It is the Benjamin Franklin effort. Google it for a better explanation than my own.
Gray rocking all day, everyday.
Came in here because curious, and now I learned something new and helpful! Glad I looked it up.
Stop caring. There is nobody you could be that will please everybody, and if there was…there’d be nothing of you left as you morphed to fit the situation and company around you. Just be yourself and ignore their passive aggressive BS or avoid if possible.
(yes, it is that simple but still harder than it sounds. Ask yourself “Do I need to give a shit about this?” and the answer will usually be no.)
Do they dislike me for no good reason? If yes: fuck them, I’m awesome!
Do they dislike me because I did something dumb? Let’s talk and let me appologise if I cocked something up for you. My intentions are rarely malicius.
This let’s me live a happy life knowing I didn’t ruin anyone’s day and ignore the rest.
Agreed.
Because of my kind nature it isn’t very often that people dislike me or have a problem with me.
When they do it’s always the same story for 99% of other people. So they just don’t get along with anyone. Can’t people please them all…
Have you considered that you’re a people pleaser? Being kind and nice is good, but do you do that in detriment of yourself? Can you say no to favors?
If you have to interact with them, make it as minimal as possible. Otherwise just blank them out; ignore them, don’t look at them, don’t talk to them, don’t notice them.
I don’t mean to be flippant, but do do you know they don’t like you, or do they just not care about you. It’s both a liberating and disheartening day when you discover no one gives a shit about you.
Haters gonna hate. It probably comes from a sense of jealousy or low self-esteem. Don’t let those people get to you. Don’t give them a single moment of your brain power. If you do, they win.
Avoid them when you can. Clear, minimal, a bit more polite than you would like to be when you can’t. If it’s work related focus on your common goal.
I’d also advise you to take some time to reflect on what makes them dislike you. If you find a lot of people who dislike you for similar reasons you may have to evaluate if you should (and can) change.
Just to not underestimate anything they do when it comes to impact.
Be direct in communication when needed, otherwise just don’t.
Thanks yea being direct is important for sure.
At work, it can be difficult, specially if it’s someone you have to work with.
The adult way is to have a talk about it and figure out what’s causing the issue.
The childish way is to talk shit about the person with others and gather support for you being right and the other person being a weirdo.
Most people go with the childish way since it’s easier and doesn’t require courage.
For some people, it’s not really an solvable issue and no amount of talking about it will make them like you. Some people are just assholes for various reasons, and it’s best to just minimally interact with them as opposed to trying to understand them. Courage doesn’t necessarily play a factor. Idk, just my 2 cents.
Obviously not the case for everyone, but I’ve been there before in the trying to reach an understanding route, and it doesn’t necessarily work. Some people are just a bit unhinged and it’s best to minimally interact.
Yeah I don’t think what I said applies to 100% of the working population. :) I have one guy at work that I’m also avoiding contact with. He is a sociopath according to all the classic signs. So some common sense is always needed.
Yeesh, good luck, man.
Kick their ass, is the most effective way.
