a thousand percent how it is. I was in the military for all of my 20’s… I got out at 32. It’s been years and I still don’t know who I am. TIme to go listen to Linkin Park while I play Skyrim 🤡
That makes you a clown? Well fuck…
You’re someone who likes Linkin Park and playing Skyrim. Embrace that shit. Take everything as it comes.
Scratch that, you’re a military trained badass who likes Linkin Park and playing Skyrim. You’ll see what you want and get that shit.
mirl
I got sober at 33 and thought too much of my life had passed by but after a couple weeks and meeting others aged 50-70 getting sober I quickly realized how lucky I was to get sober at my age and how much potential life I still might have…made it 5 years this July and looking forward to 10+
The last time i was drinking was like 10 years ago. I was sitting in a bar with a friend and we were both almost 30. I started to realise that most people in there were younger than us. Sometimes by quite a bit. The exceptions were a bunch of guys who were 40 to 60 years old, hanging at the bar by themselves, talking to “young” people and they cringed out of their minds. I told my friend that i’d rather die than end up like that. I didn’t even realise back then that was the last time i’ll ever drink.
8.5 years here, it’s not something I spend a lot of time thinking about any more but I’m going to be really proud when I get that 10.
I’m the same age, with more relapses and detoxes than I can count on my hands. I had never thought about it that way, but it’s a great perspective. I’m at day 93 today, feeling sturdy as fuck.
Congrats on your sobriety! 5 years is a huge feat and I’m sure it feels amazing! ☺️✊🏼
Congrats on 93 days, stay strong and when you’re feeling weak remember how strong you were to get this far and reach out for help!
Thank you for the encouraging words!! ❤️
I will not drink today.
grats buddy, stay vigilant
Is this what happened to RFK jr?
You need a hobby when getting sober more than anything. When you get sober you are bored shitless. Seriously I didn’t know what bored meant until getting clean
Out of curiosity, and if you don’t mind sharing, what hobbies have you picked up, or have been exploring?
All of them.
Exactly this. Woodworking, gardening, working out, macrame, knitting, eating, making spices, building robots.
For a while I felt bad about all the stuff I learned and didn’t keep up with but at a certain point I just accepted that most of the hobbies I pick up won’t last long and it’s been great since then.
eating
Hey, that’s my favorite hobby! If you have the money, photography is a super fun hobby, and if you don’t mind buying older second-hand stuff, you can get cameras and manual lenses for super super cheap.
I got my dslr for 400ish bucks in 2015, and I got one of the best macro lenses produced for my mount off ebay for 90 bucks. Add in a flash diffuser for 10 and a flash for 50ish, and I have a nice setup for a hobbyist.
Funny enough my wife is a wedding photographer, I shoot with her a few times a year and absolutely hate it. She can’t imagine doing anything else but if it wasn’t my wife you couldn’t pay me enough to do it more than once a year.
The second hand gear is the way to go though, she got some Sony camera a while back that cost like 2k new for around 900 because it had a small scratch on the body and one of the metal things that hold the thing on was loose. We ordered a new metal thingy and with a couple screws it was practically new.
I get that it’s not for everyone, but have you considered a different type of photography? Taking photos at a wedding sounds like my own personal hell, but going out into the woods to take pictures of cool little bugs or mushrooms and stuff like that is really fun and relaxing for me.
I never really got the idea of having one hobby and letting that define you.
I’m gardening a bit and I’m not very good at it, if I need some woodworking done and feel like it’s a reasonable difficulty, I’ll do that myself (badly) etc etc.
I don’t want to spend all my free time doing one thing, that’s what I do as a job already.
Oh man I put so much time into my garden this year, planted so many vegetables, started a bunch indoors on a nice indoor greenhouse I set up with one of those rolling shelves. I was basically ready to feed my whole family from the garden…
So far I’ve got a whopping 3 bell peppers, 6 tomatoes and one tiny baby squash that’s starting to grow.
Granted we had a very hot summer that I wasn’t prepared for and even watering 3 times a day a lot of my stuff just burnt, plus the ravenous squirells that ate every seedling I put out.
But I’ll do it all again next year because it was a blast.
If you’re watering three times a day you may want to think about some kind of shade or covering the soil with something to retain moisture, wood chips or straw
A lot actually. Boxing, motorcycling (riding and fixing) , mycology, oil painting, and lots and lots of books. But turns out that was more symptomatic of bipolar 2 lol
Today is the second best time to discover who you really are.
I’ve heard that gen z are aging faster than millennials than if this is what a 30 year old looks like then sucks for you guys.
Hey, gen z are 29 at the oldest still. But yes as a 30 year old we’re starting to look rougher
That’s a rough 30 year old.
His name is Hans and drinking has ruined his life.
That’s why they got sober
Pretty certain he has indeed been around for 30 years.
Hell of a paper round
Pandemic, two bad relationships and partying can can make that happen at 27, definitely not speaking from experience…
I’m newly sober at 41 and I am kicking ass in Overwatch 2
Fuck, that game would drive me to use. Glad it’s helping you out though.
Well Season 12 does suck. I swear they somehow nerfed 76, despite there being nothing in the patch notes about him.
Can I interest you in my lord and savior, valves Deadlock?
Not a bad way to approach things when it comes to hobbies and interests.
I never had a drinking problem to get over, but last weekend at 34 I did just play Ultimate Frisbee for the first time since high school. On that day I learned stretching is much more important for us 30-somethings than it was back when I was a teenager. It’s been 6 days and I’m still limping a little bit.
I don’t know if teens even know what stretching is lol. If I don’t stretch and use trail sticks before a light hike I’m fucked for a few days.
I figured I’d be fine, I work out regularly and am more fit in pretty much every way compared to how I was in high school. But, all that darting around, jumping, and occasional sprinting is a whole different beast than jogging, hiking or lifting.
While genetics certainly plays a role, never, ever, let age be an excuse. Plenty of people either start, or continue to be active, well into their later years. Heck there’s a pro mountain biker who consistently places top 5 nearing 40.
And if you can’t be active, there a tons of sedentary hobbies, too. Life is a series of experiences, enjoy them while, and whenever, you can.
A lot of the top competitors in some of the more extreme / newer sports in the Olympics had older 30-40 year old competitors.
Hubert Schwarz famously cycled around the world… twice. IIRC, the first time at 40 and then again at 46. Previously, at age 35, he completed all of the - then five - world’s Ironman competitions in a single year.
I started downhill and enduro mountain biking when I was 40. 2 years later I’m pretty decent at it. I take some pretty large jumps and drops and go down crazy steep technical shit. You’re never to old to learn. Just make sure you wear the protective gear for the sport and you’ll do fine. Also you’ll feel amazing when you conquer an obstacle that used to give you trouble.
When you turn 40 and people tell you “it’s all downhill from here,” I’m pretty sure this is what they’re talking about.
While genetics certainly plays a role, never, ever, let age be an excuse. Plenty of people either start, or continue to be active, well into their later years.
nearing 40
👴
That was an example of a pro. Watched an interview with a woman riding in her 70s yesterday
How old rolnapdo
Okay wow. This was really uncalled for. What did I ever do to you?
I didn’t need to get completely sober (I smoke pot still and have the occasional drink; I had issues with much harder drugs and as they say, “recovery looks different for everyone!”
Anyway, this is so true. It’s like… what did I used to like doing before I started getting fucked up all the time?
Well, I got back in to an online game I hadn’t played in 24 years (and didn’t know was still going!), I’m big in to riding my bicycle, reading comics, almost like being a kid again.
The grownup hobby I’m still doing is maintaining and riding my motorcycle around. However, I do it by myself now because all my old riding buddies were definitely not clean. Also, riding motorcycles is an excellent exercise in mindfulness.
I had to cut a lot of people out of my life. I’m still very lonely sometimes, but keeping busy with these things is so helpful. I’m also trying my hand at DMing a D&D campaign with a bunch of sober people, so that will help. We’re due to start next week. :)
I went back to school and am 5 years since I last did my problem-drug and 3 years in to a new career that is…. going. 😆
Amazing! I love hearing people’s success stories like this.
I feel you!
I’m 6 years clean from the hard stuff and have had a similar experience. Like who am I? What do I like? I basically got to reinvent myself.
I learned many hard lessons during my dark years, and I decided to use that to my advantage now. I’ve been through hell, so I don’t get fazed by anything at this point!
I’m a 36 year old guitar-playing video-gaming family man! Live life and just enjoy being you whoever you are!
