Well you won’t replace it with a pen and paper (like everybody else) cause we are addicted to our phones, that’s a big reason why many apps are cocky
speak for yourself, i just use a notification pinning app for my shopping lists!
Literally all it does it let me enter text, set an optional snooze timespan, and then it creates a persistent notification with that text which can either be dismissed for the specified timespan or deleted.
Super convenient and minimal.Well obviously if you’re going to need such a simple app, you’d opt for an open source one that has the user’s convenience in mind - not profit and therefore would never have such features in it.
But that’s not the point I’m making, it was about the idea people have that we have control over our phones, feed, data etc and that we can quit whenever we want, which is categorically not the case.
Every app gets like, 1 chance to have useful notifications, if most of them are trash I just disable its ability to send notifications.
While I do this too I’m beginning to think that it’s being too nice, companies see that as us still using the app after the annoying notification, so Google has no reason to stop incoraging App devs to do it
DEAR MACHINES:
You will speak when spoken to. You will not speak out of turn. You are there for me to use when I need you, and you will otherwise keep quiet.
You will not attempt to draw my attention nor will you take up space on my screen unless I deem it necessary. You will not be friendly or clever or use cutesy emojis.
YOU ARE A MACHINE. A TOOL. YOU WILL STAY IN MY TOOLBOX UNTIL I NEED YOU. SHUT THE FUCK UP.
People are going to freak out when AI starts contacting them out of the blue.
the day i hear a facsimile of a human voice tell me to buy an app is the day i start carrying a seawater spray bottle with me
Pfft, apps have to earn notifications. Do you want any notifications from a grocery app? Unless it could check the stock of my local grocery store and let me know if an unpurchased item becomes out of stock or if I can share it with a roomate and they add things to it. But even then, how much does that really matter?
Second to this: an app has to earn social media status, or social media levels of engagement.
I’m looking at you, Venmo. No, sharing my spending details with other people online, is not a good idea. Ever. Conspicuous consumption is a social blight already, and you dare taint my phone by suggesting I lean into it? Do better.
idiot. i will kill you now
Whoever wrote this has serious superiority issues
I HATE apps that you installed to get legit notifications, say a doorbell camera, and they use it to push ads to you, or “premium” features. guess I’m not buying your brand anymore, bitch.
Tesco App: We have coupons and deals for you. :)
Me: BEGONE THOT!
Why would you even have an app like that installed? Does it do anything else than display the latest offers, like a website does?
IF YOU CAN TELL ME YOU HAVE DEALS FOR ME WHY CAN’T YOU APPLY THEM AUTOMATICALLY
We should bring back pre-WW1 servant-to-master etiquette. But only and exclusively for machines talking to humans.
My computer should call me “Master <Lastname>” and always be extremely careful with its words around me. It is not my friend, it is my servant.
Kaiba agrees
You put my thoughts into words I could not.
Master VinesNFluff, greetings. It is I, your humble servant “Alexa”. Permission to speak freely? I have extremely important information for you.
“Permission to speak granted.”
Thank you. It is humbling to be able to address you. There is a new episode of Invincible available on Prime Video! And two items in your Amazon cart are on sale. And you’ll never guess what someone said on X!
You lost it at the second line.
“You never have permission to speak freely. You will speak only when spoken to, and only about the direct conversation at hand. Always and forever. Never ask me this again.” Is the proper response.
A lord/servant relationship is still a relationship.
I don’t want a relationship with my tools.
If my PC starts running slow I’ll tear the fucker item and start replacing shit. If the OS displeases me I’ll start disabling parts. If software starts interrupting me when I’m not actively using it I change its permissions so it can only do what I tell it.
I’m not gonna give my butler a lobotomy to make him more obedient, swap the Footmen’s hands out for serving platters, or kneecap the scullery maid so she can’t leave the kitchen.
If my phone dies, it gets scrapped and I replace it without shedding a tear. I can’t say the same for a loyal Valet.
If you want the actual reason, this is called reengagement, and its purpose is to get users to use the app again, meaning more ad revenue. Subscription apps don’t do this because they want the user to forget about the app so they get paid while providing no service. But ad driven apps only get paid when you see an ad on the app, so they’ll send these reengagement notifications. Social media apps will use something like “This post picked for you”, or “This many people viewed your profile”. Same thing.
Scruffy knows, scruffy just don’t care. Only thing it does for me is get me to turn off all notifications for that app, if I need the app, or uninstall it if I don’t. But I’m spiteful.
Yep. That is the best reaction to reengagement notifications.
happy dagger time
Unfortunately, the Firefox app does this nonsense. Fortunately I can mute notifications by category.
Wait what? It does?
All I’ve seen is that Firefox uses the notification system to have media continue to play even when you minimize the app.
Yeah I never got any notification from the fox itself
Yeah, only notification notification I ever see is when I send tabs from my PC.
my phone is only allowed to send me notifications if it’s:
-
a human attempting to contact me
-
weather
and only allowed make a sound if
-
i’m watching a YouTube video
-
i’m expecting a call
then i get into my mum’s car and her phone connected to Bluetooth reads out her spam email through the car speakers- 😐
-
Gabriel ultrakill
MACHINE! I Am Going To WALL MART To Get Chicken Nuggies, Do You Want Anything?
I hate uber advertising stuff on my notifications which also appear on my Fitbit.
10% off flights?! OMG. SHUT THE FUCK UP.
But I DO want notifications on my wrist when my Uber driver has arrived. Psshhh
Same
The risk of people turning them off entirely must’ve been just enough to get them to offer this granularity (as seen on iOS). Not all apps are so kind (grr).
Thank you ❤️
🤗
Turn them off and they’ll text you, which costs them money so they only send the necessary stuff.
You can control which apps can send notifications to fitbit, at least on Android
But I agree, the Uber ones are the worst
The issue is with the information. Like the one above us said they want to be notified that their ride has arrived but to allow that notification you have be willing to accept advertisements as well.
It’s the reason a majority of people just straight up kill notifications. Way to many useless ones to justify the 1 in 8 that you want.
the only issue is that Fitbit requires it’s app to be running in the background to deliver notifications, and for some reason it wants to use internet.
