TIL lol
This is from a group chat I was in and a female friend asked the group
This is brilliant.
Finally, something not depressing on Lemmy 🤝🏼
Ain’t love beautiful
Why the straw though, what’s wrong with lapping it up like a cat?
She may end up with a dick in her eye.
Well I don’t want to end up with a straw in my butt!
Are you a frog?
close enough
I took it like she’s tryna fuck but isn’t that into the guy.
That’s nothing, how about the Slovakian Traffic Cone?
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Slovakian Traffic Cone
large, preferably yellow
lol
reads the rest
jfc I’m out
That’s actually properly awful.
Hey, I’ll bring the cone if you bring the plunger. You know you wanna try it too. 👍
(both holes work for girls, only the recum works for boys.)
Stop chalenging them! It Sounds like some guys can use their uretra too
recum
just copied and paste hahahaha
Mouth
That’s a bit much, I’ll stick to the Rusty Trombone
For many years, my friends and I went to music festivals as The Rusty Trombone camp. We had a nice banner, people took photos of it. Unfortunately some asshole stole it one year when we weren’t looking, and I don’t have the patience to make another one. I’ll post a picture if I find it.
Yeah but people actually do that, as opposed to the edgy preteen nonsense above
That’s the basics of it, but there is also more “specific and specialized"
I know what I’m doing my thesis on
That’s enough internet for today. ಠ_ಠ
wtf people
Relax, take a bath.
I’m very open minded person, I think other peoples lifes are not my business and they can do whatever they want… BUT sometimes the youth make me feel like my grandma when she heard we could kiss someone without dating them. This post made me an old person horrified with the youth culture lol
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I can tell you that the person in the text is like 45yo swinger
oh god
I feel like there might be a minimum age before being able to do this… I’m in my 40s and I don’t think I could stretch out my ‘bird bath’ enough to pour a drink in it yet, except maybe on a particularly warm day…
omg! so it’s OLD balls?!!! that’s even worst lol
My life would have been better not havimg suun diS
Fella had a stroke right there
He was monkey pawed out of existence as he typed
merry cake day!
Thanks :)
Raptured
I used to make these in the bathtub all the time as a kid.
I like that this man stretches the balls first, and then makes a transaction with a bartender.
And then poors the drink while holding the spread nut sack? Fucking talented fellow. A real catch.
I mean, considering teabagging is already a thing, is this really that bad? Probably less gross than naval shots. Nobody has a clean naval for long, and clubbing is done at the end of the day, and involves dancing and sweating.
The straw’s weird though. Just lap it up.
Drinking from a guys sweaty nuts? Thats def waaay geosser than navel shots
It’s only grosser because of the sexual context, I think. Just straight bacteria, crud, detritus, et cetera, naval grosses me out way more.
All that said, I have gargled balls before (and enjoyed it), so probably not the most objective.
Then again, I’ve also done naval and body shots off bartenders, so… 🤷♂️
I dunno, honestly, I clean both daily and yet it’s my navel that gets linty and full of chunks of dead skin far faster, can’t imagine it’s any less sweaty, either
Then again I shave my balls with a straight razor every day like a real man (this is actually the test to prove manhood, sorry anyone who doesn’t, I didn’t make the rules) so maybe I’m picturing less gross balls because of that
Everyone’s focused on the straight razor to the sack, but I see you, bragging about your daily bathing habits.
My girlfriend is an aesthetician and waxes my boys on a regular semi-weekly schedule. Always perfect, no nicks. Still painful to achieve maximum manliness, but smoother and lasts longer. Look at what you have to do to achieve a fraction of my power.
Please god tell me she uses the modern wax stuff that’s significantly less painful. I’ve done the older tape stuff that just rips it all out at the end on my arm and I’m almost certain that shit would cause actual damage down there, but my wife recently had her aesthetician-in-training sister practice the new wax stuff and I was amazed at how gentle that was by comparison
Also, can’t help but imagine everyone who is an aesthetician by trade as Jandelaine from FFXIV:
Its definitely the less painful stuff lol. And even then there can be moments where I worry my scrote may tear away from my body lmao. But there’s never any damage
Why does this need to be a thing? I know it is, but people, seriously. Get on with life.
I’m not into that kind of club scene but they seem to be enjoying their lives. I approve.
you don’t wanna hear about elephant shower
Seconding the desire to know
Now I do
Lemmy is full of the brightest armchair experts who know the correct path to change the world.
Lemmy is also this post and people commenting, “brilliant!”
Wouldn’t this like… Hurt??
I assume you don’t have a scrotum to test for yourself, but oddly it wouldn’t hurt at all.
The balls are ultra sensitive, but for some reason the scrote itself just laughs in the face of danger. You can pinch the shit out of it and feel nothing. Just pinching random arm skin hurts a lot quicker than pinching the ol ballsack. And stretching? Forget about it. That’s the thing’s whole job.
just keep the actual plumbing clear of the carnage
I don’t think they’re asking about the stretching, but about having a puddle of alcohol on your scrotum. That was my first thought as well. Probably okay if it’s wine, but not sure about something high proof.
I was actually asking about the stretching more so than having alcohol down there. Well, TIL
Oh, well, silly me then. No, like the other guy said, it’s very stretchy. If you have your own scrotum, it’s easily confirmed. If you have girly parts, the skin is very similar to the outer labia: very sensitive to scratching, but it doesn’t hurt to stretch it.
Maybe if you do it with a Bloody Mary because of the
tobaccoTobasco sauce or have a cut on your nuts.“Tobacco Sauce”. That’s what I’ll start calling my morning loogies.
Fucking autocorrect. I didn’t even notice lol
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This was the picture I posted
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Moderated because of n word
Oooooh. I stole this meme from a different instance, I guess it was ok there.
Yeah, I quickly realize that while I don’t care about the word and don’t really care if it does get deleted and censored. It just reminds me of why I practice privacy and don’t really keep or create accounts. I realize why I don’t express myself. I sometimes wonder if I should delete my Lemmy account. I barely use it. I only did it to stick it to reddit at first but now I have no idea why. I don’t even know why I made this post.
It always is benefiting some rich guy and at some point I will get censored or whatever because freedom of speech is non-existent on the internet. AI now being used to censor negative views or posts highlighting darker aspects of humanity. Even more words or combination of words are banned on other platforms. They only want to make everything look great and never want it to be negative unless it makes them more money, which they will wait until later to retroactively remove them or only keep some in case people notice their old posts are deleted. Have to make it confusing as ever cause that is a money maker.
Stray pubes are free of charge
