Kind of a follow up from my question from a few days ago, for me just depresses me and usually I’m working or worried about stuff anyways so I don’t know how to enjoy festivities, plus being eternally alone without a partner makes things even sadder. Xmas is more of a post it of how much my life has failed.
Fuck Christmas.
No. My mom has always worked holidays, and so have I (once I was old enough). We would celebrate around it, but pulled back as I got older. I’m at a job that’s just closed this holiday, and it’s just a day off for me. 🤷🏿♀️
To me it’s essentially just the time we all (“we all” as in my friends and family) agree to set aside for each other. We’ll make a fuss over spending time together, and the specifics of why it’s at that time of year or why we call it Christmas or anything else don’t matter so much to us. Most of us aren’t Christians anyway.
The new year is arguably a bigger event in my area, but to be honest it’s all just kind of the festive season. Do as little work as you can manage, see the people you like to see. That’s what it’s about.
If you don’t have anyone that you would like to spend it with, you’re perfectly allowed to cook yourself something nice, take the day easy, settle in with a good movie, some snacks, and something good to drink if you like alcohol. I normally spend Christmas with my family, but the one year when circumstances did compel me to spend it alone I did this and I had a lovely day.
Maybe if you feel up for it and want to get involved somehow, you could do some volunteering on the day - at least in my personal experience, it tends to be pretty easy going and have a pleasant atmosphere, and you can feel good about what you’ve done with the time too. Most places need a bit of help during Christmas, because the normal crew’s schedules will be a bit off kilter. I’ve done a good few Christmas mornings.
If you are Christian, maybe you can engage with the religious side of it. Churches obviously have special services on the day, and they’re usually the busiest of the year too. This is obviously only useful if you do follow some kind of Christianity or at least have some interest, but if you do fall into one of those groups then don’t let nerves or a lack of other attendance stop you.
If you’re not religious but live in a Christian (or culturally Christian-influenced) area, you can maybe even take advantage of the fact that everyone is busy. My Jewish ex and her family have a tradition of going out for Chinese food on Christmas day. Everything else is closed anyway, and the Jewish and Chinese communities are the largest non-Christian groups in their area, so they’d go to each other’s businesses for the day
And at the end of the day, if what you personally feel you need most is to ignore it and make it as normal a day as possible, that’s totally fine.
Capitalist holiday preserved by corporate to sell shit
It means that I will be harassed for not being happy enough and wrong for not wanting to participate.
I think the holidays are like most things, for better or worse they mostly enhance whatever mindset you’re in. (With exceptions etc)
Unhappy about life? Holidays probably not awesome in general.
Happy about it? Absolute blast.
That being said, if you want to work towards making things better, the holidays do offer a lot of opportunities!
That’s a nice sentiment on the surface, but it mellows into something slightly toxic.
How so?
I don’t like winter in general but Christmas is ok. I try not to put any demands on anyone, and only do what I can, but have worked at a place that closes for a week at Christmas, and that has made it a lot easier, getting an actual holiday for the holiday instead of scrambling to put it together.
You have not failed, you are alive, you are successful at living by definition. If someone at the holidays is making you feel unsuccessful, that’s mean. If it’s just you feeling it, though, they may not feel the same way. My kids LOVE unmarried aunts & uncles and I loved mine too. You are free to love them without responsibility, more like a friend and that is something kids can really use.
In the end, it’s just a holiday - most of us aren’t religious, it’s a get together time, some presents, a meal. When my kids were up northish, they said winter really was depressing because of the lack of sunlight, they had not realized that was a real phenomenon and were startled by how it made them feel. So be aware you may be feeling worse than usual just because of that, not seeing clearly or objectively.
Im surprised to see that many people disliking christmas, seems like 50/50 in the comments, i would have expected something like 30/70
I find it stressful, i dont like feeling judged about how i give and receive gifts, having to be nice around my extended family even when they are mean or boring, the elaborate cooking, etc.
Im much more comfortable with new year’s night : no fixed traditions, usually with friends rather than family, overall simpler and just focused on being with people i like.
It means seeing my grandma the one (maybe two) times a year that I see her. I probably don’t have too many more of them so I want to make them count. It’s also one of the few (getting fewer) times a year I see my parents who are also aging. I think it’s good for me to remember what’s important.
There may be something in your life that is important to you that you can try to hold on to at Christmas, like your health or your pets.
Time off work with holiday pay, If you’re lucky.
Otherwise it’s a capitalism thing to buy stuff to make companies money.
I take time off of work to spend with loved ones. It’s great!
I very much hate christmas. Having a specific day to give everyone something is stupid. We already have everything we want (that’s not too expensive to be a gift), and even if there’s something special, christmas ruins it by being expected. In my family we finally managed to drop the charade after grandma died. Sadly, gonna be celebrating christmas with my GF’s family, and so far I’ve been unsuccessful in making them understand that I don’t want shit from them.
Christmas is just a giant collection of obligations that leaves us all worse off. Like getting and advent calendar, everyone gets mad when I skip days, just because I don’t care about Christmas. In my country we also have 3 days where all stores are closed for it. Great shit…
Loneliness
Sure, it’s how I get my nieces and nephews who live on the other side of the country to remember who I am. I’m a good gift giver.
Sorry to hear, try doing something small and festive, like making egg nog every year as a tradition