Which is hillarious because I’ve been kicked out of Karaoke bars for laughing too hard at my own rendition of Islands in the stream by Dolly Parton with my drunk buddy as Kenny Rogers. It was magical and hillarious. I am a respectable Karaoke singer drunk or sober.

Karaoke bars are often polluted with a pestillence of people who think they are undiscovered musical geniuses who are minutes away from being discovered by a record label executive trolling the depths of karaoke shitholes looking for the next great pop-star. Anything that fucks with their discoverability makes them go coocoo.

Not really. Ground meats with shit in them with casings (sausage) will cook roughly the same as other ground meats with shit in them without casings. (Patties) Very similar.

That’s what all the fatties say. I’m JuSt BiG BoNed! Source: Am fatty.

Classic Business Model. Make a problem. Sell it and its solution.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walter_Young_(baseball)

6’5" and 322 lbs =

Also for age: Fifty-fucking-nine!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_oldest_Major_League_Baseball_players

In true shitpost fashion, I make shit up as I go. I was too lazy to do any real research. I’m too lazy to verify your shitpost isn’t doing the same thing. Either way, ponder this:

It’s a partial truth. It’s what makes storytelling villains great. If they didn’t have an ostensibly plausible reason for being evil, villainy looks cheap and painted on. What is Thanos without his half-truth sustainability philosophy and ethics? What is Smith without this speech?

Link? He had many monologues on truthiness.

Poll: Anyone ever have hipsters in their highschool go through a bowling shoe phase?

Upvote = yes Downvote = no

Edit: By early poling numbers, I can’t tell if it was only a thing in my highschool, or if people who wear bowling shoes casually, yet ironically or even post-ironically, just haven’t come to terms with the fact that they are indeed hipsters.

Baseball?

Edit: *Gasp. Downvote!?! Very well:

Top 5 oldest and heaviest MLB players active in the 2026 season, including their age, height, and weight:

Rich Hill
    Age: 45
    Height: 6’5" (196 cm)
    Weight: ~210 lbs (95 kg)

Justin Verlander
    Age: 43
    Height: 6’5" (196 cm)
    Weight: ~225 lbs (102 kg)

Max Scherzer
    Age: 41
    Height: 6’3" (191 cm)
    Weight: ~220 lbs (100 kg)

Chris Martin
    Age: 38
    Height: 6’4" (193 cm)
    Weight: ~240 lbs (109 kg)

Carlos Santana
    Age: 39
    Height: 6’1" (185 cm)
    Weight: ~235 lbs (107 kg)

.

Stop flirting with me.

Grandma, grandpa anyone really. They say “the fun isn’t in the face”. While true, with a good gummy, the fun really is IN the face.

Forgive me. I am old and not up to date on the latest Shitpost writing style guide. I was only trained in AMA, APA and the Geological Society’s Style Guide.

Replace the sad weiner with a glorious sausage, update the ground meat with jalapenos, minced onions and cheese and this become S-tier food for cookouts, tailgate parties, backyard barbecues and pubs.

*Latvian crying intensifies.

Missing Third Panel:

Chad sitting on throne surrounded by amazing books borrowed from Libraries or stolen from greedy monopolistic university textbook predators, uh I mean, publishers.

*taps forehead.

I just updated my post with a link to the appropriate source.

Have I opened a doorway to new levels of consciousness? For better or for worse, maybe.

With your Barber’s consent, anything is possible. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)