This August is only half through,

But for some, winter’s soon to ensue

So don’t Grinch on this carol,

’Cause we know in the Barrel:

Crackers love their Christmas Scooby-Doo!

The caprines were eating their oats,

When this furball snapped right at their throats

Dogs won’t need to be taught

When you’ve already got

A little raccoon for herding goats

Variden was once a great mod,

Until Reddit admins turned to fraud

So to Lemmy we’ll scoot,

Than be under Spez’ boot

And of his own hell he can be god