I just bought a skateboard and I’m going to head to the skate park, alone. So I would say one tip (of many) is don’t limit yourself to social stigmas and have fun!
I don’t chase a big paycheck. I live meagerly, and save, but live comfortably. As they say, “love what you do and you’ll never work a day in your life.”
It’s simple, really. Just don’t search for it. Cherish the little things
Contentment is easier to find than happiness
Small things. Sounds. The temperature of the air. The fact that my side isn’t hurting right now. The kids costumes who were just trick or treating at my house.
I really love seeing a well curated list, and that’s a well curated list.
if only our lives were the only thing we focused on
I was just about to write “by lowering the bar”, but I like your version more.
still on the topic of small things that bring happiness: coffee in the morning, listening the air on the trees, the birds, nature in general, food (good food, not processed, made by you) good friends, good talks, walks.
Good friends, core friends. Good memories. Doing good things, helping. Toss in a cup of stability and a couple hobbies. If you’re practicing or just recently discovered practicing adhd, another dozen hobbies and a therapist/counselor.
What is the difference between good friends and core friends?
No real difference, all groups are different in their own way. The core group, the group around that core. Some say best friends.
Happiness is fleeting. Sometimes you’re happy, sometimes you’re not. I was told as a young man that what I should seek instead is contentment, because someone content with their place in life will be happier more often. That said, a lot of people find satisfaction and happiness from helping others. Volunteering, and being a part of your community gives someone a sense of belonging, and purpose.
Find your thing.
For me that’s been different things as I’ve gone through life. Currently in my 50s and enjoying riding a motorbike at weekends. When I’d ridden all the local roads so many times it was starting to get boring, I added another layer and am now riding my bike to every Village in my county. It’s going to take a while, but has given another layer of interest and purpose. Many people won’t understand why it’s interesting to me, and that’s fine, they don’t have to. Finding what works for you is half the challenge.
BTW, if you’ve got depression, then finding happiness without resolving that is really, really difficult. Been there and absolutely everything felt bleak and pointless. Fixing that is the first step.
A table, a chair, a bowl of fruit and a violin; what else does a man need to be happy.
Albert Einstein
by not trying to compare themselves to anyone else
Recognizing how my desires are never truly satisfied, and they cause me suffering. How they constantly shift and always want more. In other words I let go of my judgment and accept what I see. That doesn’t mean I don’t judge it at all or don’t change it. It just means I’m not attached to the desire to change things. It’s just a feeling, and I can act on it, but it’s a conscious decision rather than a habit.
A few years ago, my wife and I left the Mormon church. That helped a lot. Along that line coffee makes me happy.
Coffee would have made me an apostate too. Damn, I love coffee. Live and drink, friend.
Purpose.
For me:
- Set goals
- Accomplish those goals
That’s what gives me the best feedback. The more realistic goals I set and the more often I accomplish them, the better I feel. Bonus points for setting “due dates” for bigger goals and seeing if you can meet your own deadline.
Hobbies, spending time wirh friends and families, eating, murdering vagrants, helping the needy, and some people even enjoy comraderie with people they work with.
It comes down to figuring out what makes you happy and if you have trouble you just need to try new things.
Would you not put murdering vagrants under hobbies?
