Like the others said, try to do the stuff on your own. YouTube has helped me tons with that but I still don’t touch electrical work. :)

• Practice triage: start with small, achievable projects that can be done on a weekend. Don’t get overwhelmed. Be kind to yourself. Not every problem is immediate or needs fixing.

• If you have access to a local tools library, avail yourself of it fully. The staff are a treasure-trove of wisdom and knowledge. If not, talk to the oldest, crotchiest person at your local bardware store.

• There are so many single-use tools out there (favorite one is so you can unscrew the faucet bolt under a sink). If not, see if there’s a community online board and post a request.

• Vintage appliances, windows, doors, etc are cool. A little elbow grease and they’re in good shape. Junkyards and recycling centers are a treasure trove.

• If it involves anything hazardous or too heavy (gas, electricity, foundation), bite the bullet and seek professional help.

• Ants and cracks are small-fry. Baits and fillers are easy fixes. Focus on big ticket items. And remember, some things are best left alone (see triage, above).

Well. No, not really. Owning a house is just stressful, period. And sometimes really expensive things happen that you couldn’t foresee.

For ants, you want to get food-safe diatomaceous earth, and a bulb-style dispenser. If you can tell where they’re coming from, blow some diatomaceous earth in there. It’s completely safe for people and pets, but will kill insects. There’s also some non-toxic treatments for wood–Nissin Boracare, for instance–that will help prevent termite, ant, and powderpost beetle infestations.

Don’t tell me… I’m 36 years old. Five years ago, I bought my house—an old one in a small town here in Spain that needed a complete renovation, including the roof. After four years of very, very hard work, mostly done by myself, I managed to restructure the house. I redid everything except the exterior walls. I moved in six months ago. So, here’s what happened: last month, some workers were installing new fiber optic cables for the whole street. They climbed onto my roof without asking and drilled a hole in it to run the cables—without my consent. For the past two weeks, I’ve been battling the fiber company and insurance to get this fixed. Meanwhile, I’ve had a bucket in one of my rooms for two weeks, and the room is now full of humidity and mold. The entire ceiling, which is made of drywall, needs to be completely redone. My hair is falling out nonstop—I’ll be bald like a light bulb in a couple of months if this keeps up.

So many people who are mentally and cognitively bankrupt own houses. They never do any maintenance on them, or if they do, they never do it right. And yet, their houses aren’t (always) falling apart.

Houses are more sturdy than our anxieties convince us. Fix things little by little as they come, prioritize what comes first. Your house won’t fall apart or blow up. This is what I tell my wife when she gets nervous about something creaking.

It’s yours. Every single thing you can fix is one less thing you need to fix and adds towards your home being more yours.

I bought a house almost 100 years old, badly upkept throughout the years (someone thought it was a good idea to cover wood with cement without making sure it would not wick moisture), severely modified (it was divided into 5 separate apartments) and altered (I have a shower stall inside a bedroom!), it has a lot of work to be done and I sure have too litle time but I’ll be damned it’s mine!

Remember this is a marathon and not a sprint. So think in long terms for fixing things. Even if you sell the house having something done correctly will increase the value. Fix something and maintain as best as possible to keep it working or as high value. This feels best if you do it room by room so you can enjoy the things you fixed.

It gets boring to worry. Now I just view it as a cosy box that I’ll occasionally have to patch up. Also, getting comfortable with DIY, especially that first scary ‘dive in’ moment where you have to cut the wire, drill the wall, or pull up the board. Over time it all just gets as normal and run of the mill as cracking an egg for an omelette.

Invest in basic tools and have good relations with local repair persons, try to learn from them too as they fix stuffs. Hands on expertise is more helpful than theoretical how to knowledge. Also invest time in designing fail safe insect and paste management and plumbing. Bit of initial work usually pays off later.

And the more you open up to fix the more systemic problems you find. In an old/fixer house. Try to pick one project at a time. Spend some money when u have too. Have seen some smart people locate home improvement grants for upgrades/HVAC. You’ll need to spend money. No avoiding it. In a couple years you’ll forget how bad it all seemed and get used to the minor annoyances you haven’t gotten too. And don’t forget to learn some things. Buy a bug pump sprayer and specific chemicals on line. Learn how important gutters are and getting storm water away from the foundations. Get some rugs to cover the gaps and caulk the cracks. Most importantly A good partner for the decorating to make u forget it’s a shitty house no matter how much work you put in

To answer your question I just drink a lot.

I don’t have a fixer-upper per se, but the dude who flipped my place to sell it really cut corners. I do as many repairs myself as I can. I consult the Internet, local hardware shops, and people I know who have done home repairs. I’m currently dealing with a toilet that won’t stop running unless I cut the water supply to it. I know that I need to replace all the parts in the tank, but I haven’t been able to make it to the hardware store to get the parts.

Also redneck engineering temporary fixes is totally a valid strategy. My parents put flex seal on a fucked up part of their roof and it kept the leaks at bay for 4 years. It could have lasted longer, but they got the whole thing replaced.

My screen door is broken, and I haven’t been able to replace it, so I have it tied open and held in place against my porch railing with some yarn. In bad storms, before it broke really bad, I used duck tape to keep it shut so it wouldn’t go flapping around.

Parts of my porch siding (plastic lattice) would also start blowing around in bad storms, so I used spare boards to prop everything in place until I was able to cut all the lattice down.

You mention ant - if I may recommend, it’s worth getting a bug guy to look over your house. I would make sure to get the ones where they have entomologists on staff instead of cheap Joe’s Bug Service. Especially if you live in a place where there are termites, you want to get ahead of that.

Drop of water depends on where the water is. Watch online videos to diagnose problems, it’s the opposite of doing this for personal health. People have some crazy cheap ways to address issues.

Crack, draw a line parallel to the crack on each side. Measure it and it on the wall. Check back and see if the measurement is changing. Patch it if it’s stable. If it’s not stable, probably not good news, start with videos of what others have done.

Ants are the easiest. There are barrier sprays that will keep out any insects. Fall instructions on the product but typically just spray it on the outside of the foundation once a year.

Houses are over engineers to stay standing up so don’t worry too much. The expensive stuff will come around ever couple decades like roof replacement so plan for that but most everything can be remediated with little effort, especially if you don’t care how it looks. You said it’s a fixer up, each patch is just another layer to its character.

The biggest advice I can give is put systems in place to reduce as much as possible the list of things you have to manage freeing up your mind and time to solve more complex issues.

Stick a hose on the dehumidifier route into the drain never empty it again as an example where as before you emptied it daily or every 2 days.

I solved this by selling my house and outsourcing all those bullshit problems to the landlord.