Don’t suggest hobbies or human contact. It’s been suggested and it doesn’t work.
I have a job I don’t particularly hate nor like, some coworkers I get along with others are just morons, I go to work, then buy groceries, go home, eat, watch tv, go to bed. Rinse and repeat.
On my free days I do sport and watch pirated netflix. I don’t spend much money on clothing or media and save most of my paycheck. What for? I have no idea. I don’t eat out because I like cooking my own food and restaurants are expensive and the food is bland.
Everything is so expensive nowadays btw…
Most people bore me. I’m like an atheist monk.
I don’t want to kill myself or anybody fwiw. It’s like I don’t give a crap about anything or anyone and don’t see what’s the point of living.
I don’t want to travel because it costs money.
As soon as my cognitive abilities start to fail I’m going to be very easy prey for any online scammer.
Most people bore me.
I don’t want to say that there aren’t boring people, but c’mon… You’re no troubador yourself. People don’t exist to keep you from being bored.
Living for the sake of not dying is not a living itself. People find meaning in lots of things: art, religion, bullshitting, pushing the bounds of knowledge, making loved ones laugh.
The meaning we make is our own and we share that living journey with a few others. It can be amazing and difficult and complicated. It’s rare to have someone truly get you, but we put ourselves out there because get got is so good.
Holy shit…if you were a woman you’d be wife material.
Weak mindset. True sigmas know wife is a gender neutral term.
My answer isn’t gonna resonate. It’s so frustrating how being depressed makes getting off the couch to go for a walk just feel like… Jumping into a mosh pit ot something.
Find a 2 mile walk to do every day. Must include at least one hill or set of stairs or something. Works best if in nature.
Seeing a therapist is probably the way to go here.
I agree. If human connection “doesn’t work” then something is really wrong. It’s fine to want more than just the human connections you’ve got, but to categorically rule it out is a red flag and I think the other responses here are just providing blind alleys to someone who is unwell.
When you realise they cannot help you, it’ll make you feel even more depressed.
Well going into it with defeatist attitude will almost certainly cause it to fail, and that goes for most things in life.
Eventually, if you’re lucky, you’ll get a good one that teaches you some tools to help yourself.
I’ve had several and have seen everything from ‘amazingly helpful’ to ‘collecting a fee, didn’t even listen’.
Finding a good one is 80% of the battle. Sadly I haven’t discovered any shortcuts there.
One of the better ones I’ve seen said right at the start “we will meet three times only,” and had a tactical plan in place for what would get done in those 3 sessions.
Contrast this with another where I talked, unidirectional, for about 20 sessions and had to ask “when will I be getting something back here?” She picked up her pencil and made a note, commenting “how interesting… do you approach all your relationships and ask ‘what’s in it for me?’”
Spend your money, travel, get outside your comfort zone and challenge yourself. Or get professional help.
*And/or
Could it be depression?
Anyways, would you be able to recall at the end of the day something nice that happened to you, even if small? Gratefulness is my personal path to inner peace doesn’t matter if big or small. And even if you decide to not take this path, you can use the memory of that good moment to 1 make it happen more often, or 2 invest your time/thoughts to make it even better next time it happens or 3 follow up and build on top of it.
so you lack enthusiasm and ideas huh
you need to find a spark, something that drives you and makes lost in the moment
explore your likes, interests, values. Go from there. I know you said you don’t care, but your lack of care and enthusiasm is your current jailor so perhaps start working on the keys
Sounds like depression. If you have some savings, it might be worth it to see a therapist to find out.
Hey, I just want to say that in case you did give therapists, SEVERAL times, a chance to be a solution, and they showed themselves to be charlatans, you may want to consider that they are absolutely not the end all be all that some people may sound them to be.
I don’t have the answer, but there are leads to follow still. Someone here was suggesting giving your time to help others. If possible, this may actually help. Or not… Then try something else. Just don’t think therapists know it all, because they sure as fuck don’t…
This needs to be said more. What if the therapist can’t help you? Even worse, what if they don’t understand you? Wouldn’t that make you feel even worse?
I have tried a couple therapists. With both, it was as if we were speaking different languages. Needlas to say, I stopped seeing them.
Sounds a therapist problem and not a therapy problem. Not that therapy is perfect nor always the solution, just that you didn’t receive any.
I can’t spend all my money searching for a therapist.
100% fair, that’s my current issue. Honestly it’s bullshit they even charge for the first session.
A therapist that claims to know it all or makes promises that they can help you (esp. Short term) is just a licensed grifter. Can that fucker and find one that gives a shit.
The most significant factor for success in therapy is that the therapist has a similar condition to yours and they’re engaging in therapies that worked for them. Next it’s important they look like you (share your demographic somehow). Your dedication comes immediately after that.
Therapy.
Op why don’t you suggest what an acceptable reply looks like? You’re pretty restricted on what type of advice you’re seeking. Maybe then folks can ad libs in the thing that will help.
Honestly, if you’re in the US especially, mutual aid might at least be interesting. You can try Food Not Bombs or MADR or a regional/local org.
There’s pscilocybin or MDMA for a break from the shitshow or even a guiding light.
Therapy is kind of difficult since it’s expensive and you need to sift through multiple therapists to find one that clicks with you. It’s the most likely thing to benefit you as long as you find the right one. Maybe antidepressants will help?
At the end of the day you have to choose something to do for meaning. Change is going to take months or years. Silver bullets are the rare exception.
How’s your anxiety level? Depression and anxiety are linked pretty closely and with you mentioning the expense of things that sticks out to me you might have other issues.
It sounds like a mental health evaluation would benefit you, honestly. I would not want to be alive today if not for medication.
I still don’t feel like doing anything or being with anyone but I don’t feel worthless.
I hope you can find something that helps
If we end capitalism then human life has intrinsic value again instead of a sticker price
I think OP was looking for something within their power.
There are some decent comments here overall with stuff I bet would help you. But it sounds to me like you have lost the appreciation and rewards from life and the world around you. I would wonder if you have undiagnosed anxiety.
This isn’t going to sound great probably, but the problem isn’t the world around you, it’s just you. The good news, ‘you’ is the only part of this you can fix. The rest, totally outside of your control.
You need to retrain your brain. Slow down to appreciate the smaller things. Even the tiniest things. Read up on the raisin technique. I think raisins are kind of dumb, but apply it to everyday things. Go slow. Examine. Savor. Eat slowly. And with each bite think of the process that got that very thing into your mouth. From growing the ingredients, raising, milking, whatever. The process and storage, maybe inspection, transporting it to the store, you buying it and cooking it. The skill it took to do that and the history of you cooking to get there. It’s an awful lot packed into each bite. Do that with as many bites as you can. Be mindful. Repeat it. You don’t need a different thought every time. Just keep thinking it through. And apply that to more things throughout your day as you’re able to. It’s not an overnight process but it’s much faster than you might think to regain the value, passion for things. Do this people as well. Forgo the NPC thoughts, and delve in. How they got to be who they are. Ask questions over time and build a mental roadmap.
That’s pretty much it. I could have easily written your post word for word a decade ago. With therapy and general learning, fighting anhedonia was a process. And still is. But I do appreciate things and I look forward to things. I often look forward the most to me not being me tomorrow but a slightly better version of me.
These are classic signs of major depression.
