That not everyone cracked their head open as a kid. I just assumed everyone has had stitches in their forehead until I was in my twenties, everyone I knew had some sort of scar like that.
Rationality
Also: aphantasia
You have no idea how pissed I was to find out all of you had a fucking superpower, would have been nice to learn this before I wasted 3 years at graphic design
Knee pain. Everyone told me it was normal growing pains, until one little league coach notice I run weird. Queue years of doctors and specialists and tests and scans and surgeries, and now I’m a 40 something guy with advanced arthritis that could have been much much worse if left untreated.
way to go attentive little league coach!
also wtf parents?
My parents took me to see doctors, who told them it was just growing pains and suggested I exercise more to lose weight. I saw three specialists and had a bunch of xrays before anyone noticed the shady spots on my cartilage. Osteochondritis Dissecans occurs in 15-30 people out of 100,000, and most of the primary care doctors I’ve had in my life had never heard of it.
I can’t blame my parents for that. I can blame them for a lot of things, but they did their best.
“Well it’s not hurting me so it can’t be that bad.”
Not being able to see anything when closing my eyes and not constantly hearing a voice in my head. I have aphantasia and thought people were always seeking metaphorically about seeing things in their head.
I only more recently learnt that people actually hear things as well as in like an internal monologue. To me, the whole thing sounds exhausting.
I remember one day realizing it was odd that my dad would hug my mom but my mom would never hug him back. She would just stand there and let him hug her. Yeah he was an abusive husband and I was very happy for her when she finally left him after over a decade!
My first long term relationship was with a woman who could orgasm from penetration in less than a minute.
This was a really recent realization for me. I am one of the people who can voluntarily activate the tensor tympani muscles in my ears to create a low level rumbling sound. I recently tried explaining this to someone else and they still think I am making it up.
I didn’t learn that adults don’t stand to wipe until I was like 17
You still can if you want, but maybe don’t stand to use a bidet.
Depends on your water pressure
And on the splash zone
Lol learning a friend of mine still did that when he was like 22 was wild. He got so belligerent and tough and chest poundy when everybody was surprised. It’s not weird, really, but I still like to tease him for whatever I can since he’s such a cunt most of the time, being 6’5 and jacked and rich and smart and just an asshole in general… And I’m a masochist and he was really hot and towered over me and constantly bullied me 🥵
I literally don’t understand how people sit and wipe (no bidet). Do you fucking lay on your side to make this happen? If you’re an adult, the toilet opening isn’t that huge to just shove your arm down there, and wipe and if you’re a man then scooting up to get back there makes your penis touch the nasty ass toilet.
So what’s the solution? A slight hover while bent over? Other than that there’s only standing. I don’t understand how people do this. 😂
Just scoot forwards a bit?
Ok obviously you know this happens and you know it’s stupid and impractical to lay on your side
All the bits that need cleaning are right their up front with just a flat hand extended to get the arch of the backdoor. If you can jerk your rod sitting down then it’s only 3 more inches till you’re wiping your shitter
So don’t pretend it’s some kind of acrobatic feat
But my question is, mr. standing wiper, how the fuck do you get to your taint, or do you have to do 2 trips?
You lean a little. I don’t know how to word with without being crass, but I feel like if you’re standing the cheeks are together and you can’t get in there. 😅
Can’t believe I am writing this crap to strangers online. Ha!
Well, if you’re standing you use a hand to spread a cheek and you wipe with the other. There’s no need to grab the cheek so deep you’re touching anything that would be there, just enough to separate. You can get in there no problem.
What if you have a big butt?
Oh plenty of things:
having respect for others
being honest
helping the needy
fair pay for fair work
honestly considering others’ perspectives
loyalty
Basically every virtue I was ever told was worthy to embody has been used against me as a weapon or a tool
And of the hundreds of people I know IRL less than 10% give any of these internal value or even attempted to put into practice
And here I’ve been a sucker all my life doing the proper social contract thing because I don’t like the way the world is shaping up and getting CONSTANTLY bent over for it
Looking at light or sky when I need to sneeze helps me sneeze quicker.
It’s apparently something to do with Photic sneeze reflex. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Photic_sneeze_reflex
Synesthesia. I was about 20 before I learned it has a name and not everyone has strong colour associations for numbers and letters, or sees a visible map of time in their head, or has music take shape. It never occurred to me to question it because it’s always been my norm.
Well, the feeling of one side of your hip being out of place. Then twisting slightly to snap it back.
It’s hip displasia.
Displasia literally means “out of place”? Nifty.
Dis-place-yeah?
Is this a thing for knees? Every once in a while, my knees just pop out of their sockets. It’s incredibly painful, and I have to move them back by hand. I went to a doctor when I was like 18 though, and they took an x-ray, and couldn’t find anything
Look into Ehlers - Danlos Syndrome, a connective tissue disorder. Sufferers describe similar symptoms.
Yes, my mother has this and this constantly happens. I also had it a few times. Not a good time.
Doctors don’t know this syndrome often, how do you know it if I may ask?
I have it, the hypermobile type (hEDS)
Upside: reduced likelihood of osteoarthritis
Downside: all the pain, doctors think you’re crazy
Thank you for sharing. I think I might have some symptoms, but definitely not all. The knees though :x
Do you manage without pain meds? My mom cannot unfortunately.
I suppose so, but I’m not a doctor
https://radiopaedia.org/articles/trochlear-dysplasia
For the hip there’s also not a (as an adult) treatment, rather taking care to keep it in place and strengthen your muscles.
Watching porn to get relief.
I – as many other guys in this society – learned to watch porn at a young age. So I wired sexual stimulation as well as the dopamine release after orgasm to porn. For many years of my life, I would not masturbate without it.
I denied my addiction because everyone watches porn, right? Also I thought, being addicted to porn means sitting at home all day fapping and watching more and more perverse stuff. So I can’t be addicted, if I watch porn once a week, right?
Well, it took me a long time to figure all that out. The society having such a positive attitude towards porn did not help. Maybe, we all are addicted. I think it’s super fucked up. If not due to the effect it has on our brains, then at least due to the humiliation of women for capital.
Growing up using a poop knife.
Did you actually? Or are you carrying that over from reddit? 'Cause I actually have a similar one to that 😅
Do tell
its a TIFU post on reddit.
It’s a reference to an old reddit post.
I misread your post. I thought you had a story similar to having a family poop knife
Never did I think someone would call my bluff.
Stop. Get some help.
Dammit I thought for sure this wouldn’t be in the comments
Wait til you hear about my broken arms growing up
Ah, a person of class!
