- cross-posted to:
- aboringdystopia@lemmy.world
- cross-posted to:
- aboringdystopia@lemmy.world
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Jeebus, I need backup plans for Friday nights.
Page 8 & 9 of the court filing (not the article):
Through this time, Q.R. was able to access chaturbate.com on thirty different instances: […] seven instances on August 30, 2024 […]
Bruh, make sure to hydrate.
Page 13, absolutely fascinating to me that “prays for judgement” is stated and whether that is at all common:
Plaintiff prays for judgment against Defendants in an amount in excess of $75,000.00 for: a. actual damages resulting from Q.R.’s access to material that is harmful to minors, including but not limited to past medical expenses, future medical expenses, past and future lost services and disability, past and future pain, suffering, and disability […]
Page 15, looking for more details on alleged “disfigurement”:
As a direct and proximate result of Defendants’ negligence, Plaintiff has suffered and will continue in the future to suffer the following damages: a. Pain, suffering, disability, disfigurement, and mental anguish […]
It goes on to talk about pornography causing a shift in perspective on sex and possibly leading to addiction. Not finding anything specific on the alleged “disfigurement”.
I’m left to assume poor Q.R. will have to deal the rest of his life with the friction burns caused by jerkin’ it 7+ times on August 30, 2024.
His mom also demanded a jury trial, so Q.R. can rest easy knowing 12 strangers will hear about his friction burns and give it the serious attention due.
Good write up, thanks!
Surely you cannot sue someone for future injuries where the future injuries are entirely unevidenced. There would have to be some kind of medical assessment that said that this kid is going to suffer ongoing injuries and I can’t imagine they have such an assessment.
Maybe the counter argument should be that this kid’s mom should attempt to get him on disability payments, and only if he’s able to get on that, will they accept liability. There is zero chance of that happening.
Agreed. As a lawyer friend once told me, “you can sue someone for damn near anything. It doesn’t mean you’ll win”.
I imagine the “disability and disfigurement” will get sussed out at some point and either backed up w some sort of evidence, or taked out from the rest of the complaint.
As a direct and proximate result of Defendants’ negligence, Plaintiff has suffered and will continue in the future to suffer the following damages: a. Pain, suffering, disability, disfigurement, and mental anguish […]
More likely a direct result of his mom being a fucking psycho.
Page 13, absolutely fascinating to me that “prays for judgement” is stated
It’s not a “prayer” in the religious sense.
“Prayer” in a court filing is what the plaintiff asks the court to do to resolve the case.
Ty! TIL. I’ve probably seen it many times before, but it only jumped out at me this time given the Olathe, KS setting and strong fundie Christian vibes.
This was so hilariously stated - and your comment is quite thought-provoking.
I can’t imagine how this poor teenager will think of his mother over time.
I can’t imagine how this poor teenager will think of his mother over time.
Not well, this much is certain.
Bet that kid is counting the days until he’s legally an adult and can get away from her.
Can you imagine the roasting this poor kid gets at school because of his insane mom?
This was literally the first thing I thought when I read the headline.
Nelson (from Simpsons): “Ha ha!”
Seriously, who wants to bet this kid ends up disowning her, or ending himself as a result. The bullying would be fucking insane for that. National news over porn.
I imagine something like this.
My thoughts as well.
Just let your kid masturbate in peace. WTF.
And/or you know, put a web filter / monitoring software for free on your devices that the kids have access to.
Android: Google Family Link, and many others if they aren’t trying to use Google products.
Apple has products as well. People just need to pay attention to their kids
The products suck. Google and apple don’t really have a monetary motivation to make them good. My kid easily gets around everything. And he is only 11. The best so far was a bark phone. They had to customize the operating system because google didn’t provide ways to lock things down. He still found a work around to play music on the talk and text only phone. Only had it a week. There just isn’t profit in it. So teach your kids about the realities of the web or they will find out themselves.
Thanks for sharing! A lot of it I saw was about people not locking down phones so kids had access to uninstall and reinstall apps to bypass blocks. Which if the app store / play store is locked to a parents Apple ID, unless the kid knows their password they shouldn’t be able to reinstall the apps. But all the same I agree there will in the end be a way to get around if they try hard enough. That said, what’s to stop someone just installing a 3rd party app store and using that, not sure. Unless the parental controls block .apk files and such.
If you don’t mind me asking, why were you trying to block music though? I would imagine if you block everything, they have more reason to try to find work arounds. If they have access to music and videos that are just filtered for porn/lewd or what not content, they have less reason to try to find work arounds and are more likely to comply, especially if the punishments for being caught finding a work around is high.
In the case of the phone, it is something he will take to school with him next year. Many for the location tracking. We didn’t have the option to bus for elementary school. So this will be his first time bussing. I can totally see him just going to a friends house from the bus stop. With the phone he could text us, and we would also be able to see where he is if he forgets.
But anyway, it is supposed to be totally locked down so it is boring and not a temptation at school. But if he can play music, he probably will do so in class and cause problems. His other devices that stay at home are not as locked down.
Oh, and for the android tablet, he can use routines. One called focus can be configured to close the parental controll program anytime it tries to launch. I was actually kinda proud about how he found that workaround. He didn’t even learn it from the web, just figured it out on his own. But anyway, they only fix is to block access to settings. But then he can’t manage Bluetooth devices like headphones, or join wireless networks like at the doctors office. And the app people say there is nothing they can do because android doesn’t give them the ability to control things as fine grained as that.
I highly recommend Qustudio. It works on phone and PC, and allows you to customise exactly what is monitored or blocked so you can keep an eye on things in an age appropriate way.
We started monitoring after we found out our 12 year old daughter was catfishing a 19 year old boy. He had no idea and after we explained that she could literally ruin his life, and made her tell him her age he noped out of there. (Wisely.)
At first we had it set to monitor everything, report all searches, all app downloads, block porn, etc.
Yes she was able to get around certain features, like when she was young we had the phone locked past midnight… But it logs when it’s in use, so we then had a talk the next day and took away the phone or PC if needed.
As she got older we removed the block on all websites, and stopped monitoring any messages. We kept the software on to let us know when she was using her devices because she would often be up until 3am on her phone on a school night and we would then have a conversation about it.
We removed it when she was 17 or 18.
I currently pay for qustodio. He can pown that thing in so many ways it isn’t funny. I have had multiple conversation with thier support, and usually the answer is that they can’t do anything about that because android doesn’t allow them to. For the pc it is windows of course, and they allow even less. Given the age of your kid now, there may not have been as many youtube videos back then explaining how to get around these parental controls. But there are now.
I have a technical background, so I can understand the things he is doing. Like I know what a vpn is, and how it can be used. So I can tell him that if he installs one there will be punishments. But most parents wouldn’t even know what it is, and if they got an alert about it, would probably believe whatever story thier kid told them about it.
And don’t get me started on the horrible parental controls on the switch. And roku effectively has none (they only work on the roku channel).
If a kid has any ambition, they can get around the vast majority of controls. And if the parent is not technical, they have no chance of really stopping a kid who wants to access something.Oh yeah, they can get around it, but not without me knowing about it. If I find out, they lose the devices, simple as that.
You are right that parents who aren’t technical will have a hard time, but it’s not insurmountable. No devices in the bedrooms, ever. No downloading apps without permission ever. Google the app and give a yes or no.
When it came to it, wifi off at night and she got the basic Nokia phone. It’s a constant battle, sure but one we must win.
Also reminded her that no matter what, if she’s on our network, I will know what she’s up to. Instilling a healthy sense of fear is good. Router logs do not lie.
If it were just websites, the router can do a lot. Though with cell data, they aren’t on our router. And there is also the school wifi. And don’t forget the school chromebook… and heck, they can facetime a friend who can essentially stream them stuff. I disagree that it isn’t insurmountable for non-technical parents. There is just too much that they would need to know.
I was led to believe that if your mom (although they always call it stepmom in the title) finds you doing that, they will come in, have a very short chat, music will start in the background and they will then, um… assist you. I am shocked to hear that in real life that is not the case. The internet has been lying to us.
Unless you have 2 broken arms
Thanks for showing me more porn sites!
I assume the line of thinking is: 1) white people numbers are decreasing, 2) people are not having children, 3) they use protection or not interested because they can watch porn, 4) ban porn means more teenagers getting pregnant??
it also works the other way around, interestingly:
- future is shit
- no vision
- nobody wants to have kids anymore
- women abstain from dating
- we have a loneliness crisis?!?
deleted by creator
…sears catalog
hentaicity.com is going to be rough to live down.
Imagine going to school if you were this kid
L(° O °L)
With a mom like this he’s probably homeschooled.
My favorite part:
His mom claims this led to “pain, suffering, disability, disfigurement, and mental anguish; psychological injury; past and future love of enjoyment and pleasure of living.”
Getting caught does that
I don’t understand how these kids get caught. They gotta be really slow or something.
I was caught 0 times as a teenager. My mom never found my porn.
My brother was caught a few times. My cousin was caught in the damn car on a family vacation with OTHER PEOPLE IN THE CAR just yanking his noodle under a blanket.
I was so cautious as a kid. I guess because I was caught and thoroughly shamed when I was about 4 years old. Maybe that’s why I never got caught when I was old enough for it to matter. That shame gave me a lifelong lesson.
I had a motion detecting toy dinosaur at the bottom of the stairs. When someone approached the stairs it would go, “raaaaaawr, raaaaaawr” and I’d be sitting at the foot of the bed reading a book by the time someone got upstairs.
If they suspected anything, didn’t matter. I was reading.
When I got high speed internet (as it was called in those days) I threw out the tapes and magazines. I had a separate hard drive I’d plug into my computer juuuuuust in case, and since I was always messing with and tearing into my computer, my mom never found anything. That drive had Linux, my mom was scared of Linux.
Now that I think about it, holy shit they fucked me up haha.
When they caught me as a little guy my mom said, “oh shamy, shamy.” And my dad said, “you keep messing with that thing and it’ll fall off and you’ll turn into a girl.” They spent the whole day giving me that, “oh you shameful creature” look.
Haha, man. Wow.
Yeah, maybe my people just messed me up.
I was caught 0 times as a teenager. My mom never found my porn.
oh she knew. we all know.
Knowing is one thing, being caught cock in hand is another. :p
Did you place the toy downstairs before wanking or was it always there?
It was always there. ;)
You had enough motivation and technical knowledge, that’s why. Most people don’t even bother having separate storage with dual booting.
A 30 year old friend of mine didn’t know about incognito mode. A certain subreddit popped up, on his projector screen, as a recommendation when we were searching for a sports stream to watch. I don’t think anyone else noticed or would really know what the sub was, but I later casually mentioned this really cool browser feature to use in case you need to search something weird.
I learned one shouldn’t assume that everyone is familiar with all the digital tricks to hide what they’d prefer others not see.
“you keep messing with that thing and it’ll fall off and you’ll turn into a girl”
On one hand, fucking horrible thing to say on a child
On the other… probably would not have the effect they would intend on a certin chunk of the population lmao
“So anyway, that was the beginning of my transition journey and also how I became an absolute master of giving HJs.”
how I became an absolute master of giving HJs
It’s too bad that we can’t have positive reinforcement for (beginning the introduction to) most sex acts. I like giving head because I love seeing my partner’s eyes roll backwards. It seems like there’s so much taboo that gets us excited and eager to try something, when we should all just be trialing to see what everyone likes.
Breaking a person is the most fun part of doin sex stuff. When my partner starts speaking in tongues, I feel so accomplished!
That shame gave me a lifelong lesson.
A lot of people don’t feel shame…
I would wager that a lot more do.
My mother got drunk one night and sat me on her bed and described in detail when she got raped as a teenager, and the resulting abortion and the details of how that went. I was eleven.
Of course, being a male I can’t go around talking about the lasting effects of many such incidents that happened to me, and I’m not really expected to even connect those things to any feelings about sexual shame. So instead what it does, and what it does to many men who had any kind of sexual trauma, is we just block out the incidents and internalize the feelings and associations inward and it just wrecks our self-esteem, our standards for ourselves and our perceptions of attractiveness in ourselves.
A lot of guys process this in different ways, and trauma like this can take many forms. But it’s often expressed as later over-compensation and bravado and an image of being “in control” sexually and performative masculinity and hyper-objectifying notions of sexuality, or for more people I suspect, just an internal, festering self-esteem that doesn’t want them to be happy or feel good about themselves. For every loud, angry incel, I suspect there are thousands of men who have the same background or traumas and they just sit quietly on it forever and it robs them of joy.
That’s some dangerous assumptions you’re making here… Just because there’s a vocal minority that seems to fit the painting you’ve pictured doesn’t mean that it’s valid. It could easily be argued the complete opposite that those who had shame about the incident would hold onto it, internalize it… and never talk about it again. It can easily go both ways here.
But my statement was more of an answer to the implicit question of “why did I get the lifelong lesson when the others around me clearly didn’t?”… That answer could be because a lot of people just don’t feel shame. Doesn’t have to be “they gotta be really slow or something”. They didn’t get the lesson… they felt no shame.
Shame should be abolished after all. It is irrational. If there is a good reason for/against something, we should use that reason instead, and create a culture of habits around it.
Shame should be abolished after all.
Shame is an emotion. You can’t abolish an emotion. And shame is an emotion that a lot of people use to regulate themselves. This is a silly statement on it’s face. All emotions are irrational. Are you advocating for banning emotions?
There is a good reason that old men shouldn’t touch young women. Shame is one emotion that likely regulates many of those men from never doing it. Such that they would feel shame should they do such an action.
If you can’t agree on that, then I’m failing to understand your point or we simply agree to disagree.
In my experience, shame is not a natural emotion at all.
Rather, i’ve observed shame exclusively stems from somebody saying “shame on you, you shouldn’t do that”. Thus i infer that shame is a social construct, similar to gender.
Then agree to disagree. I can reflect on a number of points in my life where I’ve decided that I did the wrong thing. I hold shame for those actions and use that to hold myself to better standards now. Guilt and regret is part of shame.
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/shame
1a: a painful emotion caused by consciousness of guilt, shortcoming, or impropriety
Even in your context of bringing shame to people, or attempting to impart guilt and disgrace… That’s an important metric to build the exact culture of habits that you’re advocating for. Most people don’t care if they litter in the park. It’s only after you guilt them into it that they’ll do it.
But no point in going any further into this conversation. It’s clear your mind is made. Have a good weekend.
Edit: clarification.
I don’t understand how these kids get caught. They gotta be really slow or something.
I was caught 0 times as a teenager. My mom never found my porn.
Modern operating systems are different than Windows 98. You think that you’re sneeky and that nobody will find your porn folder and then your mom gets a “Popular files in your user group” mailing from “OneDrive Engagement” or a “Your browsing year wrap-up” by Microsoft Edge or a retargetting ad on the whole network because you looked at the Riley Reid fleshlight. Modern surveillance capitalism is really hard to escape.
Damn, man. That really sucks.
That’s really depressing.
I always figured we’d go down this road, and in a bout of psychosis when I was younger I even lost my head over it and we really are there now.
Imagine if the Year of the Linux desktop arrives not for any other reason but because the teens want to look at booba/peen online with privacy
Hahahaha, maybe they were onto something (this is a joke) – I consumed way too much porn at way too young an age and I did turn into a girl! Dick never fell off though sadly
:p Some folks want that dick anyway haha, so don’t worry about it.
Yeah, maybe my people just messed me up.
I’m pretty sure we’re now in a situation where most of our society’s contention is driven by childhood-induced shame over sexuality in some form or another.
And there’s not shit we can do about it because every time someone tries to make a campaign to encourage better sex-education, or even scarier, sex positivity among children, those people or groups get attacked for being pedos and predators.
This is going to be a social dividing line that gets sharper as time goes. There will be people who have a shred of intellectual capacity and haven’t been hollowed out be capitalism, who raise their kids to be free from shame and shackles of toxic social norms and let them just live and discover on their own what sexuality means to them.
And the orcs, who want literal dark-ages levels of shame, hate and fear and of course power-imbalances as deeply rooted foundations to anything and everything related to sex, and they will only want children associated with sex when it involves controlling them or worse.
As a parent, I didn’t want to mess my kids up and make them feel shame about natural things. I don’t know what the right way is, but I have tried to avoid that.
I have enough kids that I know some don’t do it early, some do.
My approach has been, “hey, that’s a private thing and no one here wants to be a part of it. Go to your room and shut your door.”
I have no idea if that’s right, and because of my own issues it doesn’t feel right, but that’s been my approach. I try to think about it logically and reasonably despite having to fight the feelings. My instinct was to say, “HEY! CUT IT OUT, THAT’S NASTY!!” All that did for me was give me an association with “nasty” and those feelings and all I had was my mind, and oh boy I wish I could erase the memory of the things I thought about as a kid.
My daughter is 16, and she’s overly open with me to a level that makes me uncomfortable because she isn’t ashamed of herself.
I also know that she will be healthy when she’s active because she feels comfortable talking to me.
She broke up with a girlfriend for pressuring her, and she told her boyfriend that she understands why he wants to do that and why he thinks about it, but she isn’t ready and if he can’t handle that he can go find a girlfriend who is on his level about it.
With my parents, you did not discuss such things. It was totally forbidden. As a result I had unprotected sex with multiple partners by the time I was 18 and I started when I was 13, started fooling around at about 9. I had some real weirdo adults in my life and I never talked to my parents about it because the thought of them knowing something so shameful about me was too heavy.
I had my first child at 16 years old. I do not believe that would have happened if I had access to education and I could have talked to my parents without feeling shame.
It feels like I’m going against my very nature when my daughter talks to me about things, but I grit my teeth and bare it, and she’s in a much safer and healthier place than I was at her age. She laughs and me because I blush and can barely look at her when she brings it up.
Maybe I’m doing one thing right in a sea of things I’m definitely getting wrong haha.
I believe we should feel shame about some things and that’s why we have to contend with it in the first place. We shouldn’t be ashamed of natural things though.
We’re here because of a long line of creatures and people banging. I don’t know why we freak out about it so bad.
Let me tell you one thing: You’re doing alright.
Having your kids feel safe enough to be open like that and yourself sticking to listening and being there is probably the best anyone can hope for.
I had an Irish Catholic nun, with the headdress and nun robes on and everything, tell my class we’d go blind and grow hair on our hands. She was making scarry eyes and jazz hands while she said it. It was a sex ed course and her #1 message to all of us jr high boys was wearing deodorant and scrub your ass in the shower. In retrospect, I think she said that in such a cartoonish manner because she knew it was ridiculous, and really she just didn’t want to gag from the stench after phys ed.
That same nun told me her favorite band was "those good Irish boys with the rap music, I just wish they’d pick a more respectful name than ‘beasty boys’ "
We were all sneaking looks at each other’s hands for at least a month after that though.
“Hello maam, your son clicked the prompt stating he wasn’t in Kansas. Our service is not offered in that state. Goodbye.”
That teen needs to drop the mom in an old-age home
Make sure it’s the horny old-age home, GMILF Manor
The plantiff is unnamed. This is a manufactured case to test getting the supreme court to pass a blanket ban on all porn.
They are from my city, if they are a real person, I’ll make it known.
The underage kid is using chaturbate to talk to live models, but of course people are hating the mom for being a lazy Karen.
It’s still her responsibility to make sure her kid uses the internet responsibly. I don’t have any desire to defend chaterbate (never used it, and don’t know much about it) but there are tons of harmful sites out there, forums, places like 4chan and 8chan which are likely even more damaging than some porn sites.
It isn’t the site’s responsibility to make sure you aren’t lying when you claim you’re over 18, unless you want every site to have all of your personal data.
Of course, it’s her responsibility. She may be going overboard but she’s still trying to protect her kid. Maybe she’s just trying to raise awareness or set an example.
Minors are their parents responsibility. If a kid is out at the park at 2am drinking with some kid who had an older sibling they stole or bought alcohol from, “there is more than 1 person at fault”. But the fact that YOUR kid was performing an illegal act and you are reporting it and claiming it is someone else’s fault is ridiculous. Who’s responsible for the boardwalk they accidentally catch on fire when trying to make s’mores by the lake? The parents. It is their job to make sure they aren’t watching porn DVDs if that is not the way they want their kids raised.
If the Internet used a metaphor like a mall, and your kid is caught crawling under stalls or into changing rooms hiding cameras at Victoria Secret, you shouldn’t allow your kid at the mall without supervision. That doesn’t mean the mall is a place minors can’t be, it means the guardians need to have educated the kids to not do such things, or be present to stop them. Kids will get on 18+ sites even if an ID is required. The kids would just make a pact at school to take a picture of every parents ID they could and share them with all their friends.
Poof now every kid has access again and everyone’s ID is being shared. So now is it the sites responsibility to figure out that mess or should the parents who’s identity has been stolen sue the other kids parents who used their ID to create an account. The only way you avoid that is by linking every email, phone number, and identification in one central government controlled and distributed to every company for free database. “For security reasons”.
Or maybe… We just tell guardians to guard their kids from the potential threats they can come across in their lives and prepare them for it. Web filters and programs are everywhere. Put a pamphlet at every school office and local library so parents know how to access them. It isn’t everyone else’s job to raise someone else’s kid, it’s their job.
So parental responsibility now consists of suing for perceived damages of… ???
jacking off?
fuck’s sake. you don’t think they’ll pass a law against THAT do you?
give it time
A settlement of $100 for the extra laundry detergent over the next few years…
I get the mom’s point that she is worried for his safet but like, that’s way too extreme, lol. Teens are eventually gonna be curious about it and learn about sex. There’s nothing wrong with fancying the opposite gender and masturbation as long as the teen doesn’t let the whole thing control his mind thus affecting his daily life if that makes any sense.
Nothing to do with safety, she wants a payout
Wow safety… She must’ve put some effort into a web filter or something yeah? No? Shes just a dumb lazy Karen?
It’s that second part that becomes an issue. The whole point of childhood is that you’re not fully responsible for your own decisions. And the internet is very weird and bad about sex. Perhaps even moreso than it is weird and bad about everything else.
Is this an actual law suit by an actual person or from a Jane doe? If this is an actual person, this mom needs to start parenting their kid instead of making everyone else responsible for her kid.
I replied elsewhere, but this is a manufactured case. The goal is to get it in front of the supreme court and get a blanket ban on all porn. This is one of the top objectives of project 2025
In such a case, does the plaintiff have to actually have a kid though? Like if it’s an open secret that the case is manufactured, do you not get in to any kind of trouble if for example you made up the hypothetical damaged child? Because otherwise some poor kid is still going to have a rough time whether the case is “real” in the sense of a genuinely outraged parent who suddenly decided to sue, or “manufacturerd” in the sense that the story is basically hypothetical and can’t be disproven and the motivations for suing are part of a political movement with backing and strategy behind it.
This is one of the top objectives of project 2025
And people actually voted for this. Talk about a huge self-own. One of many, like that farmer complaining about having to milk the cows now because the immigrant laborers are gone.
If there is a ban, the amount of complaining from men who voted for Trump and now can’t watch it is going to be off the charts.
